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January 01, 2012

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Jennifer Taggart

Very insightful, I want to give my children all of the attention they need however it is definitely a 24/7 job and sometimes I cannot seem to muster the energy that is required. When I do notice that "attention getting" behavior I try to change my behavior for their benefit.

tamarika

Hello there, Jennifer. I think that sometimes what we think is "attention getting" behavior is more like genuine anger or frustration at not getting the attention before. In my case, I tried to get attention by being so good - the "outburst" might have been considered the attention getting behavior but really it was genuine anger for going unnoticed for so long ... and, yes, it is a tough job relating to our children 24/7, and of course there will be times when one cannot do it right, right, right.

But if there is a basic foundation of trust, love and support, children can then self regulate their need for attention in positive and productive ways. The tough stuff comes from never (or seldom) having needs met - or constantly unfair priorities - perhaps.

It sounds to me like you are giving that strong foundation to your children already. So give yourself a break! :-)

Sweet Girl Tracie

This reminds me so much of Dibs, the child who was not given any attention and how much anger he had inside of him. My heart broke as I read each page of that book for class. It made me want to jump into the book and give him all of the love and care that he needed.

tamarika

Ah yes - Dibs! I haven't had the students read that in awhile. Thanks for the reminder, Tracie.

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