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May 19, 2005


the narrator

In my moves, yes, I know these emotions, and you told them so well. Of course each time I really struggle to get comfortable. Where I am (now over 3 years) is still not home...

Ronni Bennett

With each new blog entry I read about a sense of place, I see that the Wallace Berry quote I threw up on my new blog in such haste that I got the author wrong at first ("If you don't know where you are, you don't know who you are") was (accidentally) prescient.

In that long list of needed "partners" in your new home, you are establishing the "where" so you'll continue to know the "who" - your sense of self.


Silly Ronni! It's WENDELL, not Wallace. But I get the point. Tamar, this is as beautiful an homage to place as I have ever read. Thanks.


fp: thanks so much for the link. Much appreciated.

Ronni: your blogs are an inspiration to my sense of self.

the narrator: I wish you a strong sense of self. For me, shedding my fear and telling my story helps me find my home.


I'm restless. Always restless. I like change and I like to move. That feeling of invisibility is difficult to deal with, and most of all I hate telling others The Story over and over again.


I went through a time period of feeling like I didn't know myself . . . almost like I was an empty shell. It was when I learned not to be afraid of silence and alone-ness and to find "me, myself and I" good company that I started to feel like a real person again.


Tamar you have so well expressed the sense of exile, or "homelessness" that I know so well. We moved so often when I was a child, so often went through the rituals of packing, clearing out one place and settling into another, that I never knew what it was like to 'belong' to one city or country or continent. I still don't know. Though I've lived in London for a long time, I could just as well be somewhere else. This is in some ways liberating but on the other hand, there's a longing for that sense of place, of being anchored to a particular soil, a landscape.


Nappy 40: It certainly does become tiring sometimes having to retell my story. On the other hand, the more I tell it, the more I discover different things about myself or I realize that the story changes with times, my age, experiences.

Purple Kangaroo: Interesting how fear always seems to get in the way of self-discovery!

Natalie: I was loving your colorful Africans in Paris when I visited you recently. I know what you mean about "longing for that sense of place." I go in and out of that feeling on and off ever since I left Africa when I was 19. Lately, though, when I feel solid or grounded in who I am, the yearning/nostalgia seems less painful.

Richard Lawrence Cohen

A lovely post and lots of lovely comments. I have nothing to add! Thanks once again, Tamar.


Each act of writing, it appears for you is a beautiful window of self-discovery. I have enjoyed reading your lovely entries.

As to what constitutes a home, I think the answer is not fixed, but one that changes, as you have shown sometimes moment to moment.

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