Gathering in pieces of myself

Well, since Mimi's reconnection with me, and thinking about the questions she posed, I have come to the conclusion that one purpose of this blog is to gather in pieces of my life and create one whole picture of my self. I feel that for years I was dispersed into many different parts including time periods, countries, continents, towns, marriages, intellectual, emotional, social, physical ages and stages. All scattered here, there and everywhere - adrift and rootless.

As I reflect, write and reconnect with people or make new blogger friends lately, I find that I seem to be gathering my arms around and pulling in all these different pieces and aspects of my self, and slowly, but surely, becoming a whole not-quite-so-anonymous me - Tamar or Tamarika, as my father used to call me, with great love, when I was a child - a combination of all these parts:

wild and crazy, weak and strong, in-and out-of-confidence, atheist, spiritual, friend, feminist, hippie and nun, radical, mother - proud and guilty, sometimes over and at times under weight, tennis player, walker, traveler, gardener, cat and dog lover, bird and animal lover, counselor, supervisor, author, professor, teacher, older woman, activist, speaker, weight-watcher, South Beach dieter, food lover, philosopher, cleaner of toilets, bad cook but sort of getting better, good listener, music lover, blogger, wife to a number of people, past lover of some, divorcee from a number of people, yogi, cousin, niece, (half) aunt, (half) great-aunt, half-sister, step-mother, daughter (in-law), sister (in-law), confused, clear, kind, sad - oh so sad, joyful, angry, frightened, assertive, a person who likes tea, adores coffee, and sometimes gin and tonic, authentic humus or a bowl full of all kinds of berries, lover of movies, ballet, theater, books, planes, boats, trains, cars, bicycles, buses, the tube, the "T", taxis, who loves to dance and sing, play the piano, hot weather, feet - no - mountains of snow, adores the sea, swimming in it, full of life, boring and tired, lonely and yet - not alone.

And, for some reason, obscure or perhaps like notes with Mimi, or "a message in a bottle," I like to tell it to you - readers out there - my tale of me - here on this blog. Sometimes all day long and sometimes I just need a rest.

And, besides, if I didn't blog I wouldn't get to read something as beautiful and wondrous as Kiss Me Pretty, which, gratefully, I found over at Sandhill Trek who also recently, generously talked about my friendly (and right now encouraging) editor, Danny Miller.

Comments

[Brenda]

This, a beautiful post about posting your life, who you are, ways to remember and write about your life in the past and now, and how infinitesimally richer we are with our blogs! You're one of my very favourites, Tamarika. I feel so, uhmmn, honoured to meet you this way, and to share in your life as one of your readers. It's very profound, this process of publishing our daily writing. And you've expressed all that and more in this beautiful summing up like a dance that goes all the way around in a full circle all the parts of yourself that you have, so far, given expression to here.... *hugs xo

[Ronni Bennett]

Tamar, you're the only other person I've known in about 40 years who likes gin and tonic. Can't we find some time before I leave to drink a couple and get "wild and crazy?"

[Tamar]

Ronni, I love gin and tonic. It mellows me and I have a *good* time! Yes, do let's get together before you leave. It will be grand.

Brenda, Thanks! Am so glad you enjoy reading my navel-gazing ramblings. I appreciate your comments.

[Winston]

Always, I am moved by your posts. But this time, captivated is more like it. It seems that you speak to and for many of us in defining why we blog. I no longer do the hard stuff, and never developed a taste for gin, but I cherish the notion of sitting and sipping a couple of nice wines with you and liesurely talking away the afternoon and evening. Ok, you can have the gin and tonic and invite Ronni along to make sure I don't cause trouble. Thank you for being...and for sharing.

[Tamar]

Winston - thanks so much for this comment. There's no trouble you could cause that Ronni and I couldn't handle! But don't you live far away from us?