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August 20, 2005



I hold back on some personal matters. At times my blog may seem serene, but the life beyond the blog may be troubled or at least "interesting".

One reason why I tend to steer clear of politics is because of its contentiousness. I will not keep silent on freedom of expression issues. Those should matter to any blogger.


I agree with Joel, especially on politics, which increasingly I feel is often just a duplicitous game. Freedom of expression and the maintenance of those freedoms is vitally important to our humanity.

Interesting thought Tamar. To which right now I feel my answer is yes, which brings to mind the theme of your book, confronting our discomfort.

And I realised when I read your post that this is something that operates within me. I have a blog, apart from the main one, the blog behind the blog, I have not made public. When I reflected on your thought, I realise there are aspects of me, very vital and important aspects like my vulnerability which I often find very difficult to share.

The idea of the blog within the blog is a kind of recurring theme, and reminds me when my therapist asked me to keep a journal, that I did, though I also kept the journal within the journal; which I suppose if I am going to face it (what's the it?) was about my unacceptable self even in therapy!

I suppose ( I'm kind of realising this as I write) that not being able to say some things face to face is about all kinds of fears and discomforts. Fear of not being heard, fear of being misunderstood; also learning to speak of deep feelings and emotions in a way that is not accusatory or blaming, (for it's all to easy to point the finger and disown or offload the responsibility, that eases the discomfort) and in being able to speak and face our discomfort.

And now I think, have I said too much? is this far too long for a comment response? who am I saying it to? (apart from Tamar) and god what will they think? Ooooops. what the heck. Thanks Tamar, once again you have stimulated a lot for reflection, something I think about often.


Aine Livia, I appreciate that you feel safe enough to share your vulnerabilities in this comment section. I am happy to accomodate self-reflections and soul-searchings as you have permitted yourself to do here. While talking with my son on the phone yesterday I remarked to him that I am more comfortable on the blog or via e-mail than even on the phone. Through blogging, I have realized that. I guess part of my reason is that I feel I "take up too much time and space" when I am face to face. It's part of my lack of confidence "stuff." On the blog or via e-mail I feel that others have the option to opt out ... and then I feel less anxiety.

I agree, political subjects do bring up a lot of emotion, passion, anger and disagreement. It makes so many people defensive and sore. But, yes, free speech, human rights, and inclusion versus exclusion are terribly important for me, and I will always speak out about them via the blog or in person even though it might cause me and others discomfort.

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