Yom Kippur Reflections

Quote of the day:

Dear Tamar, Norm's profile of you is wonderful ... You said you would like Christmas without theology and I heartily agree.  I love the lights, cookies, smell of evergreens, music, family, food.  But I really like the traditions of Yom Kippur.  I like getting rid of all promises and obligations once a year and then thoughtfully considering which to take in the new year and how to best meet those obligations.  [Email from Nelle]

Thoughts on yesterday's walk:

Guilt is an indulgence. Feeling guilty does not take place of being responsible. Indeed, when I allow myself to wallow in agony of guilt over the past, I create an illusion that I have some control over what happened - I almost feel powerful, when in reality, helpless is what I am. Guilt is an indulgence. There is no time for it any longer. I have no control over the past. I only have responsibility about my choices right here, right now. And I choose joy.

A year ago at Mining Nuggets: Happy New Year

Comments

[tamarika]

Yes, Donna, I also love how savtadotty says she disagrees. We all have a right to disagree! And yes, to "indulgence as something to avoid as in "no more guilty for me!"

And, yes, savtadotty - life *is* complicated - that's what makes it grand :-)

[savtadotty]

Well, thank you Donna. And of course my disagreement with Tamar was qualified: I just didn't want to go all the way down the path that leads to a place there is no Wrong or Right, just feelin' good. On the other hand, feeling responsible for the ills of the world, or even for another person's mistakes, is a big waste of time and energy. Ain't life complicated?

[Donna]

I have carried guilt that wasn't "mine" for so many things for so long I think the word guilt has replaced shame (semantically) for me. savadotty makes a really good point. I have to also say that I really admired savadotty's ability to just simply state "I Disagree".

That realistic guilt... I think I think of that as remorse... I was laughing at myself when I realized that one of the reasons that "guilt is an indulgence appeals" appeals to me...? Because in being an "indulgence" it becomes something I should avoid... ahem...(as in "no more guilty for you young lady!)... guess I have a ways to go on that one! I'm not so sure THAT's what you meant! LOL! Guilt as a guilty pleasure!? I am giving myself a headache! :o)

[tamarika]

Donna, glad my weird way of thinking is helpful to you :-)

Hello there, savtadotty. I agree with you that it I can try to compensate someone I have wronged in the past, as well as apologize - very important indeed, and for that guilt most certainly has its place.

But, I have a tendency to wallow in stuff that cannot be changed - stuff that makes me feel helpless, and the more I wallow, the less I take responsibility for making different present and future choices. That's the type of "indulgence" I am referring to. Thanks for pointing that out though, because in my endeavor to be a bit "poetic" about this, I left out an important part.

[savtadotty]

I disagree; you can apologize now or try to compensate someone you've wronged in the past, if you feel guilty about it. So guilt has its place. Wallowing in guilt and not acting is indeed an indulgence.