Living in the moment slows down my pace. I notice more things more clearly. I begin to focus. I hear noises that would otherwise slip into the background when I am thinking forward or looking back to the past. I hear Mimi or Oscar as they lap, lap, lap water out of the bowl at the far end of my study. I notice a gurgling sound in the pipes as steamy water is pushed up into heating units. I feel my finger tapping on the mouse as I click on and off words that I am typing into the computer. I observe a twinge of pain shooting through my right shoulder blade and sense a burning in my eyes. I start to cough and notice that. Breathing in and out in a deep sigh, I relax into my seat and continue to tap away at the letters on my keyboard. Being in the now takes away all that anxiety of trying to prove myself, and helps me appreciate this very moment I am sitting in. Things that are beyond my control slip into oblivion where they have been all consuming just minutes before. I breathe in one long breath and sigh out an even longer one, and I notice a smile forming on my lips. It feels good. I feel good. I search for that twinge of pain in my right shoulder blade that I experienced a few moments ago, and notice that it has melted away. Eyes are clearer now, burning has subsided. Sitting in the moment reaches deep into my lower rib cage and that area inside my body is massaged and warmed by the slow breathing in and longer sighing out. I regain a sense of being - of my Self that had become invisible and blurred by anxieties, fears and all manner of uncomfortable feelings. I pull myself closer to the top of my abyss that was almost pulling me back to a lower ledge - one that I recognize. I had been there before, and it was dark, cold and lonely. I sigh deeply and the smile on my lips widens. I feel a little giggle of pleasure rolling around inside. Peace in this moment of sitting in the now. The abyss abated. As I lift my head to look around me, the room seems welcoming and full of plants and pictures, knicks and knacks that envelop me with calm. Images of pictures have sharpened into clear focus. I stop typing and stretch my arms up to the ceiling with a large yawn. So much of life is about patiently waiting - about keeping on keeping on.
A year ago at Mining Nuggets: Burn out ...
Nettie,
Thanks for stopping by.
Posted by: Tamarika | January 20, 2013 at 06:55 AM
This is lovely. I can relate to it as I move deeper into a regular meditation practice. It felt very peaceful to read it. Thanks, Tamar!
Posted by: Nettie | January 19, 2013 at 12:19 PM